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Over and over life presents us with unexpected opportunities that stretch our comfort zone. There really is no such thing as getting comfortable unless you avoid contact with others. Even nature brings experiences that affect your energy and require shifts to plans. Ultimately, we all desire to stay centered and be at peace regardless of what happens in our life.
From the energy perspective, you have peace when you have graceful boundaries with the people in your life, feel grounded, refill your energy regularly and have balanced exchanges with others.
Sounds simple, but as far as I can tell it’s the most complex part of being a soul in a human body.
People want more than you have to give at times. Their fears or trauma get triggered, so they grab on to you to ground and regain their balance. It can really throw you off. They make mistakes that impact you. Or you make a choice that has unexpected consequences. Having something unexpected rock your world, including someone who brings destabilizing energy, is like getting caught in a storm.
You’re on a hike in the mountains on a sunny day. You feel at peace.
Thunder rolls in the distance. Your inner-voice says, “I know this one. Got it. No problem.”
Lightening ripples across looming dark clouds you see beyond blue sky. Do you feel at peace now?
Hair stands up on your arms as the storm moves your way. Your inner-voice is like, “Maybe it’s a good idea for me to change my plan, turn around, move to lower ground, seek shelter?”
Do you feel at peace now?
Lightening is hitting the high points. Torrents of rain are pelting down. You didn’t bring a rain jacket. Your inner-voice is running through all sorts of possible bad scenarios laced with criticism, “You know better. You didn’t tell anyone where you were hiking. You didn’t come prepared. Your intuition nudged you to turn around. If you had, you would be back to your car by now.”
Your drenched, tiny hail pelting your skin. Thankfully the lightening has passed. But not the self-critical voice. Your energy was thrown off. How do you regain your peace?
Life happens. Your peace will be tested over and over again. Sometimes it will be due to a choice you made that has consequences you didn’t expect. Sometimes it will be others energy that impacts you and requires some work to reclaim your peace.
When something is stealing your peace, its most important to return to the basics (see diagram).
- Visualize your grounding cord. A fresh one, deeply rooted in the earth. (RED ARROW)
- Reset your aura bubble. This is me. That is you. We can love each other, have compassion, help each other and NOT be IN each other’s bubble. (BLUE CIRCLE)
- Call your energy back to you. Imagine it coming from the person or situation that your peace was lost to, pouring back in to fill you up through the top of your head. (GOLD SUN & ARROW)
The tests to your peace will come. That’s a guarantee. But you always have the power to reclaim your peace by reclaiming your energy.
Your energy is your power. When your energy is gathered, like drops of water in a river, its power is amplified. You choose to give your energy to the people you love, the causes you support, the work that allows you to live. And at times you may find yourself feeling unfocused or drained.
Imbalances of energy exchange are energy leaks. They occur when you work or live with an energy vampire. When you are helping ground someone who is ungrounded. When you have been programmed to believe that your power is too much. When you chronically give more than you receive. When you are raised to not have permission to say no.
If you are dealing with someone who always wants more from you. They don’t know how to regenerate their own energy so they hook into the energy of others. At work this could be a manager that sets unreasonable deadlines, creates destabilizing drama or micro-managing busywork. At home this may be a family member who always has demands, is angry or interrupts what you are doing to make you focus on their agenda. They may play victim or use guilt to hook you and use your energy.
“Energy is the driving force for the universe… One form of energy can be transferred to another form.” Scientific Principles
This science is true for human energy as well as energy held in the earth elements. You have the opportunity to focus the transfer of your energy in a way that is fulfilling by shoring up your energy leaks. As you become conscious of how your energy is being used you can stop the leaks and create more balanced energy exchanges.
The most effective way to stop energy leaks is regularly practicing Active Meditation (more info). In this practice you visualize your energy field (aura), reset your chakras, create a new grounding cord and call your energy back to yourself (video example). Defining what is you and what is not you, energetically through this process, is key to dissolving the hooks from energy vampires too. When you own all of your energy, by being aware of how you are sharing it in the world, it is harder for people to take it from you without your agreement.
Your energy is your power. It took you a lifetime to develop how you share your energy, so be patient with the time it takes to break the habits that lead to energy leaks. Each energy leak you stop gives you more focus and fulfillment in your life.
Tags: being centered, being used, chakras, draining energy, empowerment, energy leaks, energy vampire, focus your energy, giving too much, grounding, inspiration, meditation, spiritual energy, visualization
Who taught you what boundaries were allowed or expected? It’s not a subject taught in kindergarten or elementary school. Boundaries are demonstrated socially. They are both subtle and exacting.
The greatest cause of suffering I see in sensitive people originated from a lack of clear boundaries.
Your parents may have told you “no,” punished, shamed or discouraged you from activities that made them feel uncomfortable, crossed their boundaries. They may have had no boundaries or a lot or rules about touch, words, privacy, food, allowed emotions, money, how to dress, nudity, topics of conversation, personal space, time, performance at school, in sports or work.
The rules you learned at home may not have worked at school or with your friends who had different boundaries.
You need healthy boundaries. When another person shows you their boundaries you know how to relate with them. They create a clear container for understanding your world.
When the adults around you growing up don’t have boundaries, don’t honor your boundaries or change the rules frequently, it creates a state of heightened alert. The good news is that you likely have stronger than average intuition. The bad news is you have it because you didn’t feel safe and had to intuitively read the world around you all the time, to navigate the shifting boundaries.
Intuitively tracking those around you all the time is exhausting and confusing. It’s exhausting because you don’t get to relax into a sense of safety. It’s confusing because often the energy or feelings you sense in those around you gets misinterpreted as your own experience. Keeping your psychic antenna open all the time blurs the boundaries.
For example, you work at an office and have a passive aggressive co-worker. You find yourself feeling angry a lot but can’t say why. When you leave work, the anger subsides. Because you are immersed in their energy with no boundaries it feels like your own anger. Reading the mood of those around you is a skill learned in order to camouflage and create a safe space in an environment with unpredictable boundaries.
As child in an environment of unclear or absent boundaries reading others to protect yourself and prevent harm is essential to survival. But to read someone this way is to get in their psychic space. Over time this survival skill creates suffering because you feel everything around you. So how do you learn to reset your psychic boundaries?
Resetting your boundaries so intuition can work for you rather then against you requires consciously owning your energy field on a regular basis. Practicing simple active meditation tools is what works for me. A series of visualizations that create healthy energy boundaries can be applied on a walk or in a conference room. In the simplest form, you notice your grounding cord, set your aura bubble, put up protection roses and call your energy back to yourself.
To feel more of you and less of those around you isn’t hard-hearted. You still have compassion and can even help others more when you aren’t matching their emotional state.
If you are interested in cultivating these skills Active Meditation training can be purchased HERE.
Tags: boundaries, energetic boundaries, family rules, healthy boundaries, intuition, life, meditation, personal space, psychic sensitivity, sensitive children, sixth-sense, trusting your intuition, visualization
Meditation is a pathway to strong intuition and inner-peace. You don’t need to sit with your eyes closed to meditate. I’m an active person and need to move my body. Walking meditation is the way that I have been able to more consistently commit to meditation and insure I regularly set my energy to my truth. In this video I share with you the steps I take to clear out and reset my energy field with walking meditation.
For many years I’ve traveled frequently for business, staying at hotels. A room may look physically clean, but be littered with the energy of prior guests! To insure I sleep well and don’t pick up any unwanted energy a guest has left behind, I set the space of the room to my vibration.
You can too! I share the visualization steps below.
This is helpful when you are staying at a friend or family member’s home too. It will help you sleep better. Setting the energy of a space is not taking it over. It leaves the space cleaner than when you found it.
I was reminded of the importance of this when I visited a spiritually tuned-in friend in Taos, New Mexico over the Memorial Day weekend. The first night as I lay down to sleep, I automatically started my space setting visualization. I noticed the energy in the room was uncomfortable with my attempt to set the space and figured it was because I was staying in a home of a powerful spiritual woman who set her space intentionally.
Still I didn’t sleep well. There was a shaky energy I felt in the room that kept me from true restfulness.
The next morning as I soaked in the gentle spring sun while writing, I felt that shakiness again. Since I was sitting outside of the house it was easier see the source. I saw an old Indian woman, heavy-set and draped in many layers of clothes. She wrote codes of spiritual protection into the thick walls of the adobe house. Yet she came from a time much older than the structure.
I psychically saw that the magic had been set on the dirt that was used to make the adobe bricks for the walls. Her codes were written to destabilize the energy of an enemy. Thus the shakiness I felt. It was a form of protection for her tribe and the land.
My hostess also noticed that over the course of living in this home her voice had become periodically shaky without a physical explanation. With permission from my hostess, I used spiritual tools to end the agreement between the code maker and dirt that was used to build the house. That night I was able to set the space in the guest room to my vibration and slept perfectly.
When you visit family, friends, travel for work, on vacation or simply want to reset the sleep space in your own bedroom, take these three steps to have a more restful sleep.
- Visualize a red rose in the center of the room that is as tall as you are, with the blossom of the rose as big as a stop sign.
- See eight golden cords with one end connected to the blossom of the rose, four connected to each of the top corners of the room by the ceiling and four connected tow the bottom corners of the room by the floor. If there are more than four corners add more gold cords.
- Intend that the rose and gold cords hold this space for you while you are in it. Claim the space as clear of outside energies and in present time. You can include other loved ones sharing the space with you in this intention.
For extra credit, visualize a big pitcher full of your own special cocktail of energies you would like to experience while staying in this space (rest, peace, happiness, comfort, playfulness, etc.). Then imagine poring the magical energy into the room from above, filling it up with all those good vibrations. The new intention overrides energy that was in the space before you arrived.
Sweet dreams and safe travels intuitive journeyers!
The world has been pretty wacky lately. As much as I’d like to be able to give you a magic remedy to lift you up out of the mire, the truth is there is no such thing. But there are a couple tools that will help you claim your inner-peace.
One is to connect with the essence of your soul’s presence in your body. This can be done on a bike ride or on a yoga mat. There are no rules aside from breathing and being aware of the present moment. In order to let go of thoughts of the past or the future, let your awareness follow your breath. The more you do this the easier it is to return to your center and recognize the energy that isn’t yours but is affecting you. My next point!
Not everything you feel is your own. Knowing this helps you ride the waves rather than be pummeled in the surf, to stay sane in the midst of a wacky world. The second tool is to identify and clear other people’s energy out of your space. Let’s do that!
What you feel that is NOT generated from within has three primary sources:
- Absorbing someone else’s emotions such as sadness, anger or fear
- A direct energy whack, such as being blamed, shamed or punished
- Group energy, collective beliefs or feelings
Absorbing emotions can happen through supporting someone you love or unconsciously healing someone you are physically around who is suffering.
An energetic whack, has two parts: your feelings generated from it and the energy sent at you by the person. Psychology says understand and heal your feelings but misses the second part.
For example, a client of mine is a teacher and one of her students needed to be sent out of class due to behavior that was preventing others from learning. The student’s parent went into a rage on the teacher rather than acknowledge that her child was out of line. She blamed her for shaming her son.
My client was completely thrown off. She questioned herself and how she handled the situation. She had followed normal protocol. The student had been given multiple opportunities to change his behavior. While her colleagues validated that she did no wrong, she couldn’t find peace. The energy whack from the parent was in her space. Until the energy that wasn’t hers was moved out, she felt “off.”
Group energy impacts can include world events, the community where you live, where you work, worship or socialize in-person or online. The news, politics, natural disasters, beliefs about wealth and poverty. These are compounded by the number of people feeling and radiating out discontent and fear. Collective energy gets into everyone’s space. Clear it out regularly!
Start with the breathing tool, then move into this simple visualization:
- Imagine a bubble suspended in the air in front of your body
- Intend that any energy that isn’t yours move out of your body into this bubble
- It may or may not be attached to a specific person or experience. For example, move out all financial fear that is not yours. Ranging from the global economy to the specific fears of your spouse or parents.
- Name the feeling behind the energy you are moving out: disappointment, pessimism, depression, anger, jealousy, shame, exhaustion…
- When the bubble is full of all of the energy that is NOT you, watch it float to a faraway place in your mind’s eye and pop.
- Then call your energy back to yourself from the sources you identified. See yourself being filled up with the energy of your own essence, like liquid gold flowing into the top of your head.
Hopefully it helps a little bit to know the influence of wacky global, cultural or social energy around you has a real impact. It’s not just you and you’re not alone. Use this awareness and these tools to claim your inner-peace.
When the sky goes dark, before the light of the moon starts to return again, new moon energy supports planting seeds for your dreams. What you focus on or envision at a new moon has more potency. This month the new moon falls on April 7th. Take time to consider with intention what dreams you would like to manifest in your life.
The exercise in my blog post last month set a strong foundation and prepared your creation space. Now you are ready to manifest your dreams. Remember: Foundation + Creation = Manifestation
Harness new moon energetic support and be intentional with your manifestation on the day of the new moon or day after. You may want to repeat the practices from last month’s blog post first or do them now if you haven’t yet.
Make a list of what you want to manifest in your life. With these intentions in mind, follow this simple mediation:
With your eyes closed, imagine that the base of your spine (root chakra) has an anchor connected to the center of the Earth. Just above this connection and below your belly button is your sacral chakra, it is where you hold creation energy. Say to your sacral chakra, out loud or in your thoughts, “thank you for everything you have helped me create and will help me create in my life.” Gratitude fuels positive creation.
Move up your body now to just above your belly button, this is your solar plexus chakra, where you hold your personal power, the “will” that gives you what is needed to manifest your creations in the world. Before you set your manifestation intention it helps to give your solar plexus a healing. It is your center of gravity, where you balance your body’s interaction with the world.
Over the course of life, you have had your energy whacked for showing your power. Whether it was at five years old by a controlling parent or recently by a co-worker uncomfortable with your attempt to manifest something new. These whacks leave scars. They change your response to the world and get in the way of feeling permission to use your power to manifest.
Imagine you have a paint brush in your hand that has been dipped in gold. The gold has healing power. Use that paint brush to touch each scar or open wound on your belly. As you touch them with the paint brush they heal.
When your healing is complete, visualize a rose directly out in front of you. This rose is your manifestation tool. You can imagine separate roses for each area where you have dreams to manifest such as financial ease, a relationship healing, a new home. Or you can use one rose for all of it. This is your life, so play with what works for you.
Remember the list of what you desire to manifest, drop words or images representing these dreams into the blossom of the rose. I like to be both specific and general, such as imagining a new home with a fireplace made of river rock, and add the feelings that I want to experience related to my home: peace, comfort, ease.
Fill the rose in your imagination up with the literal and feeling oriented values you hold for this manifestation. For example, if you ask for abundance, be specific that you want financial abundance/prosperity versus an abundance of bills. And include what you would like to feel as a result: I have enough, money comes ease, I have unlimited possibilities etc.
Once your manifestation rose is brilliantly shining with your dreams and desires, see a bubble around the rose blossom for protection. Then ask the Divine Mystery (God) to bless the manifestation. Imagine the stem of the rose being snipped to set it free and watch it float up into the sky to be manifest.
Keep your faith strong. Take any actions you need to support your intentions. When you ask clearly and set your energy to match the vibration of the manifestation, the universe is free to support you! Blessings to you, as you manifest a life that is better than you ever imagined!
p.s. I note the new moons on my calendar for the year so I am reminded when reset my intentions. You may want to do this too. Click here for a calendar of new moon dates.
The two critical energetic steps to manifesting a positive new experience are:
- A Solid Foundation
- Clear Creation Energy
Think of it this way: Foundation + Creation = Manifestation If the foundation isn’t in place or the creation energy is muddled your manifestations don’t last or aren’t as great as they could be.
A strong foundation means you are grounded so you are stable as the change shifts your center of gravity. When the good comes you want to be able to enjoy it. The root chakra at the base of your spine is your energetic foundation. It is where you hold the energies of survival, safety and security.
To establish or reinforce your foundation, follow this simple meditation:
Visualize your root chakra connected to the Earth by seeing a beam of light or tree trunk attached to the base of your spine extended down into the center of the Earth. Set your intentions that this new grounded foundation is “in present time” by thinking of today’s date. Claim that this foundation is only for you. You ground for YOU, no one else (unless you have young children, it is important to ground for them too).
With your solid foundation in place, move up in the energetic body to just below your belly button. This is your sacral chakra where you hold creation and sexual energies. Clear creation energy is free from past limitations and the influences of others in your life. It is important to clean out your creative energy space so you don’t repeat undesirable experiences.
To clean out your creation space imagine you are holding a helium balloon on a string. The balloon’s job is to collect up all the energies you are cleaning out of your sacral chakra. Imagine these energies move out of the area of your body just below your belly button, like a wisp or silver strand they move into the balloon filling it up.
Here are some energies you may want to move out of your creation space and into the balloon:
- Fear of failure
- Need to control the creation/outcome
- Other’s discomfort with your success, competition
- Belief that only a certain range of possibilities are available
- Grief from false starts, unfertilized seeds, miscarriages, unfulfilled dreams
- Possessiveness, someone’s energy keeping you to themselves or possessing you sexually
- Depression, hopelessness, discouragement
- Blame, shame, anger, jealousy
- Attachment to the form the creation needs to take
- Energy whacks/wounds from your past attempts to create or to your sexual energy
- Unworthiness, the lie that you don’t deserve to manifest or can’t because of x y z…
- Fear of success, resistance, suppression of your ability to have what you want
- Other’s attention on your creation. It doesn’t matter if it’s curiosity, poor boundaries or mal intent, move it out, it is in your way.
- Rigidity, feeling stuck, stagnancy
Now that you’ve cleaned ALL that unwanted energy out you may have a bouquet of balloons! Thank them for their assistance and let the strings go. Watch the balloons floating up into the sky, higher and higher until they disappear.
For extra credit, imagine filling your sacral chakra with energies you would like to experience in your creative space such as ease, inspiration, unlimited possibilities, sensuality or whatever you like.
With your solid foundation and vibrant creation space you are empowered for brilliant manifestation. I’ll dive into manifestation in my next blog post.
Remember: Foundation + Creation = Manifestation!
Life is full. We make choices each day to prioritize our time and energy. Our choices are affected by our energetic state when we make the choice. If we are distracted, depleted or in a hurry we tend to make choices that further the sense of exhaustion or create an inner-dialog of self-judgment.
We don’t often consider how much we are being influenced by the world around us. We have bits and pieces of other people’s needs influencing the amount of energy we have for our life. Past encounters such as the person we accidentally cut off in traffic who blared their horn at us, and future expectations such as the pile of clothes to put away or the call to return, subtly drain our energy.
It’s challenging to make room for what we want in our life. We increase our odds by regularly cleaning out our energy field to insure we are choosing from a powerful place. Then our choices lead to creating what we want rather than self-criticism.
To clean and reclaim your energy field, follow this simple visualization. Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and see yourself as grounded (connected with a link of energy from the tip of your tailbone to the center of the Earth).
Now imagine a rose in front of you. Its job is to clean out the energies in your aura that are not serving you or clouding your choices, small and large. Intend that the bits of attention still on you from any people you’ve interacted with or had thoughts about are drawn-out of your body and into the rose. This may take a few minutes.
Watch as the energy leaves, specifically from anyone with whom you feel there is something unresolved. Also ask that the energy be cleared out information you’ve seen on the news.
Once you feel the energy from others and what is happening in the world has been cleaned out, see the negative thoughts and emotions you have put upon yourself be drawn out of your aura and into the rose. These can be emotions such as self-judgment, disappointment, frustration or shame.
When you feel complete, imagine the blossom of the rose is surrounded by a bubble that lifts it up high in the sky so it floats off to a very faraway place. Then see the rose evaporate and the energy recycle in a neutral fashion.
Before you are done, take a moment to fill your aura in with your own energy and a vibration you would like more of in your life. Imagine a big magnetic funnel above your head drawing your energy to it from any person or place you’ve had attention on. Add to that funnel a hefty dose of the energy you would like more of such as, creativity, peace, clarity, inspiration, courage or happiness. Then see the funnel fill your body up through the top of your head, overflowing once full to coat your entire aura with this positive energy.