Archives For control

Perfect Pictures

Natalie —  September 30, 2010 — 6 Comments

When reading the energetic body for clients I look at areas where they want to create change and positive shifts in their life.  I consistently see perfectionism rear its judgmental head to block joy and love that has manifested in people’s lives.  The energy of perfection and its companion control are two of the most pervasive human challenges.  Our life experiences, family, teachers and peers help us form pictures of what we can expect in response to particular situations.  These pictures can help us manifest desired outcomes and protect us from harm.  But if the picture is based on information that is not true for us, such as a response to someone else’s fears or a past trauma of our own, it can create repeated negative experiences. 

When seeing psychically these pictures are presented to me as associated to one or more of the chakras.  They may interfere with our sense of safety, the ability to create and communicate, our sexual energy, personal power, affinity for others and our self, our analytical and intuitive capacity or connection with Spirit.  See my chakra definitions at this link.  Pictures that are out-of-date or invalid can get stuck in our space and subconsciously contribute to generating experiences that are not in our highest good.  The story behind any perfect picture goes something like this, “When I have the right job, partner, enough money or time, THEN I will be happy.”  Another form the perfect picture takes is, “When I lose twenty pounds, get my house tidy or finish my degree, THEN I will be ready to meet Mr. or Ms. Right.” These pictures keep us waiting for perfect circumstances in order to HAVE what we desire. 

When we grow up in an environment of criticism we develop an inner voice that is riddled with self-judge.  This critical voice is constantly seeking an impossible status of perfection, feeding the concept that we have to be in control to be worthy of love.  The perfect picture energy blocks us from truly receiving positive things we have manifested in our relationships and environment.  If you notice yourself afraid to “get your hopes up,” in self-sabotage or judgment, invalidating yourself or an experience you have created, most likely there is a perfect picture at work.  The first step toward freeing your spirit from the bondage of perfection is to acknowledge it.  Take the opportunity to visualize a bubble about five-feet in front of you and allow that bubble to collect up all of the perfection energy in your body and mind, drawing it out of your space.  Imagine the bubble floating off to a distant mountain where it pops and dissipates.  Then see a bubble above your head filled with love and the vibration of your own essence.  Call your energy home to you from wherever you’ve left it.  Let that bubble full of golden light slide down into your physical and energetic body filling up any areas where the perfectionism was moved out.  Breathe in the expansion of greater self-love in your body.

Shame Detox

Natalie —  September 8, 2010 — 7 Comments

Shame is powerful and toxic.  It is a form of control through judgment, a way of dictating what makes us worthy of love.  Shame seeks to alter our behaviors through sending an energy current into our aura that invokes a sense of rejection, punishment, dirtiness, imperfection, being wrong, having shown an ugly face of humanity, crossed a taboo, revealed a secret, been inappropriate or weak to our animal instinct rather than shown civility.  It may even suggest that our physical attributes or character traits are flawed, too fully revealed for the comfort of another.  We can accept the shame into our sense of self, engage in a power struggle in order to defend ourselves or learn to be neutral to outside judgment. 

When we feel shame for our words, actions or physical body it is a form of poison.  The energy enters our aura with a signature of self-rejection, even self-hatred.  Our physical and spiritual bodies absorb the toxic message and move farther away from peace.  In balance, our inner guidance is meant to be finely tuned to the needs of our authentic self.  When we hide or suppress our authentic self we detach from our intuitive truth.  Then our physical body responds chemically to the sensations of stress, tension and fear that are created in response to the toxicity of shame.  On both the physical and mental level, barriers are built to hearing our spiritual guidance.

Shame is commonly used to rear children to fit into social structure and invoke a sense of morality.  This programs us to feel guilt for thoughts or activities we were taught are shameful, even when there is not another person present to judge us.  Abusers use shame to emotionally manipulate their victims.  They claim betrayal if the victim reveals the abuse; energetically turning it around to make the victim feel responsible for their abuse.  Use of shame and guilt to control human behavior wounds and suppresses the light aspects of our nature along with the shadow aspects.  A healthier way to establish a sense of moral guidance or socially appropriate boundaries is to acknowledge the behavior or words as valid while expressing that they make the witness or recipient feel uncomfortable.  In this scenario, the person responding takes responsibility for their own feelings and communicates their boundaries without punishing the other or trying to control the situation.

When presented with the energy of shame as a conscious adult, its impact depends on the person delivering it and whether it hits us where we have a prior wound from shame.  It may feel good to openly communicate that whatever is being judged in us is perfectly acceptable.  But we also have the option to go beyond sending a return-volley of energy in the power struggle.  When we heal wounds from past shame, we can become unscathed by other’s judgments and even find humor in their attempts to control. We heal these wounds through self-love and the help of others experienced in shifting outdated behaviors and belief systems.  Clairvoyant reading is one path to identify the wounds from shame and heal our energetic body from layers of shame based suppression.  Ultimately when we detoxify our lives we are healing future generations and stopping the cycle of abuse.

Are You Being Bullied?

Natalie —  August 18, 2010 — Leave a comment

We assume that bullying stops when we grow up and leave the playground of our childhood but it just changes form.  Children grow into adults that learn ways to get what they want through other means.  On the healthy side of development we take care of our own needs or ask others when we need something from them.   Overt bullying is not tolerated among adults.  Yet if a person doesn’t learn how to communicate their needs in a healthy way, they often continue to push their agenda on others in more manipulative ways.  Sometimes this looks like a co-worker, friend or spouse who gives you options regarding a decision. When you choose an option that is not the one they want you to choose, suddenly it is no longer an option.  You have no real choice.  Control energy can be very subtle, such as someone telling you what you are going to do, rather than asking you what you are going to do.  Or hijacking your time through pressuring you to do something they want you to do.

In the process of Self development, trying to control a situation is one way we test our boundaries with others and determine what is required to make things happen that we want to see happen in life.  Children need good examples from adults who respect each other’s time, needs and energetic space.  Adults who take care of the child’s needs and teach them healthy ways of getting their needs met.  Behind all bulling behavior is a person’s fear that their needs will not be met. 

When a person is bullying, you may sense their energy in your third chakra (solar plexus) personal power space.  The control energy is trying to tap into your power center and redirect it for their use.  It creates a sense of being pulled off balance.  One part of us considers going along with their agenda to gain approval, even when we know the path is not right for us.  Another aspect of us gets angry at having our needs and boundaries disregarded.  This can activate resistance or conflict in the relationship.  We don’t always have the desire or option to end the relationship with a person who bullies us, such as a family member or co-worker.  In these situations we can use our energy awareness and practice self-care. 

Here are two tools for preventing the bully energy sent your way from sticking to you:

1)       Body of Glass – Imagine your body as invisible like Wonder Woman’s airplane.  The control energy sent toward your body goes right through and has nothing to attach itself to.

2)      Protection Rose – Visualize a rose that has a blossom as large as a stop sign and a thick stem that goes all the way to the center of the earth.  Intend that this protection rose stands between you and filter out any control energy.

These tools will help you hold your center and feel unscathed by outside attempts to redirect your energy.  With a clear mind and neutrality you can choose the path that is right for you.